Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Thankful Grateful Blessed

When I first found out I was pregnant, I logged on to the What to Expect When You're Expecting website to chart the baby's growth and development.  Even though its my third, I am still amazed at how much changes in any given week. There are forums for each month of each year that babies are due.  Some of the forums form secret Facebook groups for more privacy and less censorship.  I joined a group for women due in May 2012.  There are about four hundred of us from around the world, all with different backgrounds, different socioeconomic status, different marital status, various ages, but all with the common goal of bringing our little ones into the world as safely as possible.  It has been an interesting journey.  Sadly, some women experienced losses in the beginning of their pregnancies, some a little later.  There have been some babies born extremely prematurely, some doing well, others not so well.  We are getting to the point where although its still early, it seems like there is a baby or two born every day.  One of the women in the group recently posted a picture of a bracelet she ordered:


This is exactly the reminder I needed right now: I am thankful, grateful, blessed.  I understand these are available online, here.  I have not ordered one and cannot vouch for the store, but I wanted to at least give credit to the artist. I am not sure I would wear the bracelet, but I have found a similar design in a locket that I might order.  I think A ring would be ideal, though I have yet to find one.

Gratitude is important because it changes your perspective.  It changes your focus from what you don't have, or what you can't do, to what you do have and what you are able to accomplish within the confines of a given situation.  Without gratitude, happiness is fleeting.

My favorite story about perspective took place in the Spring of 2010.  I was one my way home from one of several trips to New Orleans.  It was very early in the morning, I think the plane took off around 7am.  The way that airport is set up, there is really no where to get coffee that early once you've gone through security.  I was exhausted, grumpy, I hadn't had my morning infusion of caffeine, and I just wanted to get home.  As I was boarding the plane, the guy behind me was talking about how New Orleans does everything big, especially the size of their beers.  I bitterly replied that everytime I leave New Orleans I gain five pounds and go home with a hangover.  He replied that it sounded like a good trip.  He was right, it had been a great trip.  It was productive in that I had resolved several cases, and it was fun.  New Orleans is a city I really enjoy.  I didn't have to change the facts at all to see my situation in a more positive light, I just had to change my perspective.

It is easy to take the everyday things for granted, especially when life gets crazy. Life with me on bedrest has been hard on everyone in different ways.  Bernie has been taking care of everything without being asked and without complaining, but I know he is exhuasted. Nick has been great about helping with Jack.  I think the person it has been the hardest on is Jack.  He knows things are changing, but he really isn't sure how.  Everyday he asks me if we are going to go somewhere fun, and I have to keep telling him that I have to rest for a few more days.  To say that Jack has been a challenge lately is an understatement.  In the blink of an eye he goes from a sweet, caring, charming little boy, to a defiant, uncooperative, immovable force.  Some of it is just being three and trying to find some independence, but I think a lot of it is him trying to process what is happening.

The good news is that we've made it to April and I am still pregnant.  I am 36 weeks now, and babies born at this stage are very often "take home" babies, meaning they can usually leave the hospital when mom does.  One more week, and we'll have made it to "full term," which is of course, the goal. At that point, the restrictions are lifted, I can come off the couch and the nefedipine (medication normally used to control high blood pressure, but also used to lessen the effects of contractions, which gives me terrible headaches).  I am thankful for a lot of things, but I am especially thankful that we've made it this far in the pregnancy.  It was a pretty scary proposition when we thought little Vivian might arrive at 32 or 33 weeks.

I am grateful that I have a job that has allowed me to work from home while being on bedrest.  If I had to start my leave early, it would have affected how much time I can take off once the baby arrives. Additionally, without work, I think I would be going even more stir crazy.  Work keeps me occupied and productive.  The alternative: daytime television, is definitely not a good option.

I am blessed in more ways than I can possibly count, but especially, that I am surrounded by such a wonderful, supportive group of family and friends. I don't know what we would do without all of you.

I am once again a few weeks behind on the photo challenge.  Photo Challenge 11 was: Black and White. Photo Challenge 12 was: Song Title.  I am going to cheat a little here (what else is new?) and use one picture to catch up:



Obviously the picture is black and white.  This was taken at the Colchester Dog Park Easter Egg Hunt. The song title is "Sweet Child O' Mine" by Guns and Roses, which is applicable, at least most of the time.

I am looking forward to dyeing eggs with Jack as we get ready for Easter.  Enjoy the rest of the week!

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