Christmas In Connecticut

Nine days of talking about almost nothing but my husband and I seem to still have an audience.  It's a Christmas Miracle - LOL!  Just kidding, he is an interesting guy afterall.  That brings me to Lewis' latest antic.  It seems he's found the wrapping paper.

It is very hard to enjoy Christmas when you work in retail.  The stores are mobbed with people, you have to fight for parking, shoppers are grumpy, and you have to listen to what seems like a very narrow selection of Christmas music relentlessly, beginning around Halloween.  There is more pressure in retail during that time of year, than any other.  Because of all this, Christmas in a lot of ways, just isn't fun for Bernie.

I on the other hand love the whole Christmas season - usually. I have a Christmas playlist on my ipod that I add onto every year.  I have to go see Christmas lights, have a visit with Santa, and get our family photo taken. By Thanksgiving I usually have a pretty good idea of how we are going to tackle the holiday, what presents I need to buy, etc.  I enjoy the shopping, the wrapping, making cards, and sometimes even (gasp) the cooking and baking. 

This year, it seems our feelings and motivation toward the holiday have flipped.  Bernie is pressing me for lists, reminding me I need to pick out recipes, and help come up with a plan.  It seems I am so busy with everything else that Christmas at this point, although it is 15 days away, is little more than an afterthought. In insurance and in some areas of law, things tend to slow down a little around the holidays. This year just the opposite has happened while we all deal with the aftermath of storm Sandy.

Bernie put on Christmas music while decorating the tree, he's been making a gingerbread house with Jack, and he's been ordering presents and picking things up while he is out and about.  Jack is so excited about Christmas, I don't know how he'll be able to wait a couple more weeks.  Having Lewis is fun for Jack and he is enjoying his advent calendar that my mom got him for his birthday.

Bernie took the week off because he has a lot of extra vacation time to use up and to help get ready for Christmas.  Watching him get into it (probably because of Jack's enthusiam), is starting to bring some of the Christmas spirit back for me. You will probably never catch Bernie singing Christmas carols, but he has his own brand of yuletide magic.

My favorite Christmas story is from 2000, when Nick was 4 1/2.  Bernie and I were not together at that time and we were sharing custody.  It was my turn to have Nick for Christmas. I brought him to Georgia to spend some time with my grandparents and my dad.  He loves my grandparents and my dad and always has a good time there.  My fondest childhood Christmas memories are those that involve my grandparents and my cousins, and I wanted Nick to experience that.  The problem was that by then, Nick already had holiday traditions that he loved and they involved his relatives back home in Connecticut. To make matters worse, Nick had caught a stomach bug and was not feeling well for much of the time that we were there. It was also very obvious that he was missing his dad.

I called Bernie and asked him to fly down.  My dad picked Bernie up at the Atlanta airport very late on Christmas Eve.  Before Nick got up, we had Bernie pretend he was sleeping underneath the Christmas tree. Nick's face just lit up when he saw Bernie on Christmas morning.  We told him that Santa had brought his dad on his sleigh so that he could spend Christmas with Nick.  He had so many questions about how that happened, he thought is was the coolest thing, ever. I decided at that point that we could travel for any of the other holidays, but that Nick should always spend Christmas in Connecticut.

De Plane, De Plane

In honor of Vivan's first flight today, Lewis is taking the Little People Airplane for a spin.

Here is Vivi on the plane.



My job requires some travel.  Sometimes I don't travel much at all and other times I travel a lot.  Either way, when I am not home, Bernie has to rally the troops and try to get everything done.  This is no small task. I really appreciate the fact that when I have to leave, I know that things will be fine when I am gone and when I get back. 

Hold the Wheel and Drive

Poor Lewis has been relegated to the car tonight.  It's a good thing he has a hat, it is freezing out there.

It's only fitting that Lewis is holding onto the Max and Ruby Christmas DVD, which Jack was watching in the car the other day.  Jack loves that show almost as much as Bernie hates it.  Bernie got an email from Groupon not too long ago that was offering a discount on the live show, "Max and Ruby in the Nutcracker Suite."   Bernie said that attending the show would be his worst nightmare!

The beginning of Bernie's territory for work is an hour from the house.  Needless to say he spends a lot of time driving. By the time the weekend comes, he is so sick of being in the car, it is hard to pry him out of the house.  Yet he still helps a lot with carpool to St. Bernard's. As his job is slightly more flexible than mine, he takes on a disproportionate share of the doctors' appointments (especially when they involve shots), dentist appointments, vet appointments and other miscellaneous things that pop up from time to time. He does a lot of the drop off and pick ups at daycare.  He even drives me to work at least once a week. When we lived an hour from my office, I couldn't stand how I wasted two hours of my day in the car.  Even now, I think a 30-minute bus ride is too long.   Bernie never complains about his commute, he just accepts it as part of his

day.

Bernie taught me how to drive (although sometimes he denies this).  He drove me to my high school graduation and he would have driven me to my law school graduation except that he left later than I did to drive other members of my family. Three times he drove me to the hospital, and then drove us home a few days later with a new member of our family. He drove us to the breeder to pick out Jenny, and then drove us there again to pick her up. He has driven us to Georgia and back dozens of times for our family vacations. Here he is driving the boat after we actually get to the lake:

Bernie has sat in a ton of traffic many years to drive us through Bright Nights, one of our almost-annual holiday traditions. As soon  as we can get organized enough to get his permit, Bernie will teach Nick how to drive too.  The literal act of Bernie driving us places is symbolic of how he steers us as a family.  He keeps us moving forward and all of us going in the same direction as much as possible.  Bernie will tell you that sometimes that is entirely impossible. Either way  I trust we will always get to the place we are meant to be.

The Price Is Right

Lewis has found his way into Bernie’s coupon collection.

I think it was on New Year’s Eve in December of 2010 that we saw the first episode of Extreme Couponing.  We were intrigued but didn’t think saving that much money with coupons was really possible absent extenuating circumstances.  After seeing the show, we started taking coupons a little more seriously.  I admit that I had my doubts that saving $.35 on toothpaste was really going to save us a lot of money.  We had been regularly grocery shopping at Walmart since their prices seemed to be much better than our local Stop and Shop.  Grocery shopping without a clear plan led to a grocery bill that regularly exceeded $200/week.

Being in retail, Bernie already knew that things were cyclical and quickly figured out that you couldn’t just use the coupons in the Sunday paper to go grocery shopping that week.  You had to save them until the item went on sale.  Instead of buying a large tube of toothpaste, you buy the smallest one the coupon will allow when it is on sale.  In some cases the sale price will be $.88, most stores will double the $.35 coupon, and in that case you end up paying $.18 for toothpaste.

Bernie’s job puts him in various stores in a variety of locations which makes it easy to take advantage of many sales and specials.  His routine seems to have become scanning the sales circulars as they come in during the week.  On Sunday when he’s watching football he cuts the new coupons, organizes the stash and puts together the grocery list. He often places an order online at Shoprite at Home where we can either go pick up the groceries after the store collects them for you, or you can have them delivered if you know you will be home during a specified window.  This is way easier than trying to shop with little kids.

Bernie’s got this down to a science.  We may not be buying thousands of dollars of product for pennies like the people profiled on the TLC Show, but he has managed to get our grocery bill down to about $100/week and we have more food in the house than we did before.

At one point, many years ago when Blockbuster was still open, we rented “The Price Is Right” game for what was probably the Gamecube.  Bernie knew the price of everything, it was really unbelievable.  I didn’t stand a chance playing against him.  Whenever I hear the term “fiscal cliff,” I think of the game on “Price Is Right” with the man climbing up the side of the mountain.  Maybe President Obama should reach out to Bernie before we get to the peak as a country, Bernie might be able to save the yodeler and the country from an economic freefall.

Puttin On The Ritz

Lewis has been snacking on and playing with Ritz; he made a giant "L" out of them.

It is a good thing Lewis likes Ritz and not Club Crackers since Bernie works with Nabisco products. Following in the footsteps of my dad and grandfather, Bernie began working for the company when he was 21.  I say "the company" because its actually been many companies. The latest is Mondelez International, Inc. which ended up with Nabisco after the recent split from Kraft Foods, Inc.

Bernie turned a part-time job putting product on the shelves into a career. I'm jealous that he has the flexibility to work from home and often tease him about whether he's going to leave the house and go to work on any given day.  The fact of the matter is that Bernie is a very hard worker.  He manages a group of about fifteen people.  He is always available to them, to his management team, and to his external customers. It seems he is always on the phone.  He is loyal to his people and will fight for them where he can. He tries to manage his group the way that he would want to be managed - with respect, autonomy and accountability. 

Being good at his job not only helps him provide for his family, but serves as a postive example for the kids. Bernie is a good father, good husband, good employee, and a good boss.

Don't Hate Me Because I'm Beautiful

In attempt to look as good as Bernie, Lewis is using his hair gel.

"I never thought of myself as being handsome or good-looking or whatever."

- Elton John

I think Bernie would agree with this Elton John quote.  Even Bernie will admit that sometimes he is wrong, and he is wrong about this.  He is handsome, and even more good-looking then when I met him. His kids are cute too - although I may be slightly biased when it comes to them.

Photo by Carolyn Fedus

Photo by Karl Reifschneider 



The Best Medicine

Lewis, like Little Vivian, is feeling under the weather lately.  Vivi is fine, except she has been spiking some higher fevers in the 102/103 range with no other symptoms (not even fussiness).  Last week we think she may have had a stomach bug, and this week we think it may be teething, although it seems a little high for that. She stayed under 100 degrees for most of today, so hopefully she is finally on the mend.

Vivi's personality seems to blossom by the day.  We discovered over the weekend that she hates the taste of Cherry Advil.  She clamps her jaw down and the only way she'll open her mouth is if she is crying and then you have to try and get little drops of the medicine, one at a time, in the back of her throat so that she doesn't spit it out and she doesn't choke.  It literally took both of us to get medicine into our six month old. Bernie found some grape flavored Motrin today.  If she needs it, hopefully she will take that one willingly. Interestingly enough he purchased actual Motrin for her - if it was anyone else in the group, the generic brand would have been sufficient.  He adores his little girl!

Bernie is very good at taking care of little ones, especially sick ones.  He is good at getting them to take naps by joining them in that activity. I have a very weak stomach, so we decided early on that he would deal with bodily fluids and I would cut fingernails (a task he hates).   He is good at getting Vivi to do "tricks" - like waving, high five, blowing raspberries, etc. He is also good at making her laugh, and her laugh is absolutely contagious.

Bernie is good at making us all laugh, not just Vivi.  His sarcastic and witty comments have gotten me to take life and myself less seriously.  I've been trying for years to get him to try an open mic comedy night, but he doesn't feel like he has enough material to be successful.  I respectfully disagree.

Bernie can change my whole mood or attitude with just one comment or prank.  Having him around just makes life more fun.  The fact that he takes such good care of us and makes us smile, are just two more reasons why I am lucky to be married to him.