Sunday, February 16, 2014

18

Nick is 18 today. 18.

I feel like his transition into adulthood is coming like a freight train. 18 today. Graduation in May. College in the fall. It is how it is supposed to be. It is exciting and terrifying all at once. Especially now that it seems more likely than ever that he will go away for school. 

He is ready. He is smart and funny. He has a great head on his shoulders. He will be fine. I will be too, somehow. What choice do I have?  Life marches on whether you want it to or not. 

I was very much into theatre, dance, and music in high school. I went to the Greater Hartford Academy of the Arts as a dance major. My dream was to be on Broadway. I tried to get Nick involved. He never showed much interest. I didn't push him.

Last spring he wanted to join the theatre club at school and work behind the scenes. He wanted to do this so that he could spend more time with his girlfriend. He not only made the play, but he got a pretty big role. He really enjoyed being on stage and the whole process. He continued with the club for their fall production. He recently began singing for his "Wizard of Oz" audition. He has had no training whatsoever and he sounds amazing. I was shocked when I heard him. I got my talent and some training from my Dad, who got it from my Grandmother, who got it from her parents. It is so fun to watch it emerge in the next generation. He just finished an audition for the Niagara University Theatre Department. A year ago, I never would have expected that to happen.

I am looking forward to helping him finalize college plans, watching Nick take his high school  sweetheart to the prom, seeing him perform as the Tin Man, and being there as he accepts his diploma. I really could not be more proud of the person Nick has become.

Happy 18th Birthday to my "little" boy. I love you.








Friday, February 14, 2014

Orange Blossom Trail

Running is just as bad for my health as it is good.  I have an unhealthy obsession. When I am training for a race, there are very few things I let get in my way.  Injuries are a good example of this.  I pulled some muscle or some nerve or disc, something is out of place and I have pain in my right leg from my butt to heel.  I haven’t called a doctor, I haven’t rested it, I ran 10 miles Wednesday morning.  The pain really isn’t that bad.  I only hobble if I have been sitting for too long. 

The other way that running is hazardous to my health is that I insist on running outdoors (when the weather permits), and I don’t always know where I am going.  I was in downtown Orlando this week.  I had planned to run around Lake Eola.  It’s a pretty little park with a sinkhole in the middle that is now a lake. 
I discovered on a 5k run Tuesday night that the trail around the lake is only .8 miles.  While the scenery is interesting with a pretty fountain and lots of ducks and swans, it was not interesting enough to run 12.5 laps.  I had considered driving over to the Disney resort area for my long run, but I didn’t really have time. Waiting until I got home and running in the snow and ice, or on the dreadmill, didn’t seem like a great option.
I have driven from downtown to the Universal Studios/Premium Outlet area before and it seemed fine.  It was about 10 miles from my hotel. I plugged it into Google maps with the plan to run five miles towards Universal and 5 miles back. It was very early, still dark, and not a lot of people were around. I read an article in Runners World at some point that insisted that it was safer to run in the early morning than in the evening.  The article indicated that most incidents that happen to runners happen after 5pm.

The downtown area of Orlando was pleasant enough. I discovered some restaurants that looked interesting for a future visit, I ran by the Amway Center, home of the Orlando Magic.  I often think that the best way to discover a city is on foot.
Then I crossed the railroad tracks, literally.  The tracks presented a symbol of a socioeconomic divide.  As I followed the Google Map prompts into uncharted territory, I heard a man on a bike laughing at me.  He was laughing in a friendly kind of way.  He looked like Morgan Freeman, but he sounded like James Earl Jones. He asked me if I was feeling ok this morning.  I responded that I was, he kept laughing and informed me I was in “black territory.”  That was my warning that I was in a place that I didn’t belong.  I panicked a little. I never thought he was a threat, and he was not, but I debated about what should I do.  I could hear my mom in the back of my head lecturing me about being safe and not running alone in strange places  If I turned around at that point, not only was I only a mile or so into my run, but it would make me look less confident and more vulnerable. That was the last vibe that I wanted to give anyone.  I decided to keep running, hoping that the streets would become less ominous. They did not. 
 
I truly believe that no matter what your status in life or the color of your skin, we have more in common as human beings than we have differences. On this run, I passed homeless people, prostitutes, and drug addicts.   My circle of friends and family includes alcoholics and drug addicts; it includes mental illness, it includes people at or below the poverty line. I’m not naive enough to think that I could never be homeless.  I really do my best not to judge people.  Everyone has a story. Yet, seeing all of this come together at a time and place I wasn’t expecting, came somewhat as a shock to my system.

Once I got to three miles, I decided to head back to the lake and finish up my run there.  I don’t know if there was ever any real threat to my personal safety.  Most people I met were friendly, smiled and said “hi.”  A drag queen offered me fifty cents for a cigarette. I had on running attire and an arm band holding my iphone, I am not sure why I looked like a good candidate for a cigarette sale. A female prostitute told me I looked hot. I guess I need to take complements wherever I can get them at this point in my life. One guy told me to be careful and not go down a specific road because there were often mean Rottweiler’s on the loose. I felt like there were a lot of eyes peering at me just wanting to know why I was in a place where I clearly wasn’t wanted. It was uncomfortable on a lot of levels.
 
When I got back, I googled Orange Blossom Trail, aka “OBT.”  The southern stretch of OBT is where I did much of my run.  Not only was I surprised to learn that Orlando is one of the most dangerous cities in the country, but that Orange Blossom Trail is one of the most dangerous sections of the city.
I ended up on OBT for a reason.  I have been feeling underappreciated in a lot of ways lately. I’m tired.  I resent that fact that so many things in my life seem like a daily battle that I just can’t win. My run Wednesday morning helped to snap me out of that mentality.  Being on OBT was like God just telling me to stop whining already. It was a reality check.

I went to law school for many reasons, one of which was to make a difference.  There are many pro-bono opportunities in the legal arena. I have great admiration for people who have started running groups that have helped a specific population overcome a difficult challenge; such as Next Steps. I want to do these things. I don’t do them because I feel like I am too busy, too overwhelmed with everything in my life.  These are simply excuses, and I have lots of them.
I am where I am today because people were willing to help me.  I’ll be going back to OBT, or rather its Hartford equivalent, but not as a scared, crazy, defenseless woman running through the streets alone.  I’ll be going back to help, and hopefully in a meaningful way.  And yes, Mom, I promise to be a little more careful about where I run when I am alone and away from home.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

2013

At Ruth and Todd's 2nd annual New Year's Eve Party, Ruth wanted to know our top moment of 2013. As I thought about it, I couldn't come up with just one. It's been a pretty tough year for us, but even still, there are plenty of things worth celebrating. Here is what I consider my top 10 in no particular order:

1. Finding out that Nick is a talented actor and singer.
2. Watching Jack sword fight Darth Vader
3. Hearing Vivi say "mama" for the first time, seeing her walk for the first time, and just watching her grow before our eyes.
4. Bernie's roast
5. The surprise celebration of our 10th anniversary at the lake; and the day trip to Chatanooga with the kids.
6. Taking mom to NYC
7. Celebrating pre-Christmas with my Dad and Arleen, and getting to know Lindsey, Louis, TJ and Laura better this year.
8. New Orleans
9. The birth of my new niece 
10. The overwhelming outpouring of generosity, love, and support from our family and friends when we lost Bernie's dad.

There are so many more I could list here. We are truly blessed.

I look forward to the successes and challenges that await us in 2014.

Happy New Year!

Friday, December 6, 2013

Random Thoughts & Elf Shenanigans

I celebrated my birthday with Bernie, Jack and Vivi on Monday night since I was traveling on Tuesday. Bernie surprised me by making an awesome eggplant parmesean and red velvet cupcakes (both on my list of favorite things). Have I told you lately that I love him?
 
On Tuesday I needed to get my license renewed before I left for the airport. A word to the wise: don't wait until the expiration date to do this. You now have two options: a verified license and an unverified license. The unverified is easy. You bring your expired license and get a new one. However, it gets stamped "not for federal identification," which in my mind renders it wholly useless. The verified license requires everything but a DNA sample. The list of necessary documents is longer than Jack's Christmas list. Get organized a few weeks before you head to the DMV or AAA. You'll thank me later.
 
I had the unusual privilege of working in Georgia on this trip. Georgia is not usually part of my territory. This meant that I was able to spend two nights with Aunt Kelly and Uncle Rich, and have dinner with my cousins Lindsey and Jeremy. We celebrated my birthday there too. As always, it was great catching up and just being able to hang out with them. 

I love seeing my family near Atlanta. I hate the mad dash to Hartsfield Jackson at rush hour. I left Duluth (31 miles from the airport) at a little after 7am for a 9:55am flight to Tampa, and I made it to the gate just as boarding began. The traffic is insane. It took me 45 minutes just to get out of Duluth. The airport recently opened a new terminal.  Instead of continuing to add on to the monstrosity why not follow in the footsteps of other large cities and open a second airport on the other side of town (Houston, Dallas, Chicago, NYC, etc.)? How about half way between Duluth and Blairsville? That would be convenient (for me at least - LOL). I landed in Tampa on time for my mediation, and yesterday turned out to be a productive day.
 
Last night, I checked into the hotel in Tampa, ordered dinner, and found the couch in my room in time to catch the opening scenes of "The Sound of Music Live."  I recognize there are a lot of haters out there but overall I thought it was well done. I appreciate what the producers were trying to accomplish. The Sound of Music is not an easy score to sing. Anyone who has done theater recognizes how hard it is to do on stage. The added element of being live on television only makes the performance even more complex. I don't think it is fair to compare Carrie Underwood to Julie Andrews. Can anyone replace Julie Andrews? Putting Underwood in that role accomplished the goal of reaching an audience that had probably never even heard of The Sound of Music. To make live theater (something that is monetarily out of reach for a lot of folks), easily accessible, can only be a good thing. It was the most entertaining three hours of television I've seen in awhile. I hope other musicals will follow suit. As an aside, it did irk me that Walmart was allowed to use the score in their commercials. That is just plain wrong in my book.

In stark contrast to Atlanta, I had a 7:30am flight from Tampa this morning. I left my hotel room at 6:25am. I arrived at my gate at 6:53am; 28 minutes later. In that 28 minutes, I returned the rental car, checked a bag, took the tram to the terminal, went through security, and obtained a Starbucks skinny vanilla latte. Amazing, right? It probably would have taken 28 minutes just to get the latte in the Atlanta airport. 

While I was away, Bernie was in charge of the elves. He complains about this task, but secretly, I think he enjoys finding new ways to surprise Jack. The first thing Jack does in the morning is look for Lewis and the girl elf (we want Vivi to name her so she remains "the girl elf" until that happens). I love how excited Jack gets when he discovers their latest antics.

On Tuesday night, the elves toilet-papered the Christmas tree.

On Wednesday night, they went fishing:

Last night, they became "newsicians" and tried to make the sock monkey disappear.


I am headed home and really looking forward to seeing more live theater as Nick stars in "The Tale of Two Cities." Pictures (and maybe video) will follow.

Stay warm and have a good weekend!

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Oh Christmas Tree



Waiting for the tree to be wrapped.


Sunday, December 1, 2013

28 Days of Thankfulness - Day 28 - Opportunities

It seems rather fitting that this is the last post in the "Thankfulness" series. We submitted all of Nick's college applications today. The files will be complete once the school and his teachers upload transcripts and recommendations and his ACT scores are transferred. While not entirely complete, they are officially out of our hands and off our to-do list until we start getting responses. Up next scholarship applications and financial aid forms.

Nick applied to 10 schools at varying difficulties of admission and in different parts of the country. Some days he wants to start by commuting to a community college, and other days he wants to go away and have the full campus life experience. The indecisiveness seems to be part of the process. I just want him to make the best possible decision for him. The list in alphabetical order is:

1. Assumption
2. Canisius
3. Duquesne
4. Eastern CT State Univ.
5. Morehead State
6. Niagara University
7. Tennessee Tech
8. Three Rivers Community College
9. Univ. of CT - @ Storrs & Avery Point
10. Univ. of Pittsburgh

It was a little more emotional than I anticipated. I'm nervous for him and excited for him. I'm a little sad for me, I can't believe he's graduating in six months. He is ready for the next step.

I'm thankful that it is December 1st and we are this far along in the process. Mostly though I am thankful for all of the opportunities that will presenting themselves to Nick over the next several months. 

Whatever decision he makes, I just want him to be happy.

Friday, November 29, 2013

28 Days of Thankfulness - Day 27 - Making Memories

Jack has never had a birthday party before this year. His birthday is so close to Thanksgiving that we usually just have cake and open presents when our family has gathered for the holiday.

Jack was very clear this year that he wanted something different. He wanted a bounce house in our yard. That is a great idea unless you are a November baby living in New England. I almost gave in. It has been pretty cold this weekend so I am glad I didn't. The compromise was for us to take four of his friends (2 from daycare at Kellee's and 2 from preschool) to Bounce U in Rocky Hill and then have everyone back to our house for pizza, cake, and presents. My sister, brother-in-law, and niece and nephews (who are sadly too "old" for Bounce U), joined us at home. Jack couldn't imagine a party without his cousins.

Bounce U was really fun. Vivi is big enough now to enjoy some of the inflatables and she loves the slides. 

Bernie made Jack's cake, as he always does. Jack never asks for anything easy, yet Bernie delivers. This year Jack wanted an Emporer Palpatine cake. Bernie raised the bar yet again with this creation:


It passed the Vivian taste test:


Jack was a little overwhelmed by the whole thing. He alternated between saying "this is the best day ever" to being on the verge of a melt down.  He blew out his candles before we sang "Happy Birthday, and didn't want us singing to him. He says he hates that song.

Thank you to everyone who came for making Jack's birthday special. Today I am thankful for the chances we have to make positive and lasting memories for ourselves and for our kids. I think Jack will be talking about this for awhile.